How is it going to be?

I have a soon to be 6yo daughter, who started Kindergarten this year. I will be honest with you..... I was very anxious about M. going to school.  I tried not to show how scared I was for her, specially since she was counting the days to go to her "big kid school." 
M. is such an amazing little girl with a heart of gold.  She cares and she knows how important it is to be nice to people and help those who can't help themselves.  However, M. can also be very shy and would never hurt a fly...... and believe it or not, that was the reason for my anxiety before she started school. 

See.... my husband and I teach (or try to) our girls to be good to others, no matter what color, size or gender.  We don't judge people by the way they look, we help those in need, and we should always be nice.  We believe this to be essential components of good and decent members of society.  However....... I can't control the world, much less M's "big girl school."

I can't control what other parents are teaching or NOT teaching their kids, and I can't control, or foresee how kids will behave....  So, how do you teach a child to be nice and yet assertive?  How do you teach a child to not hit and yet defend those who need help?  How do you teach your child to stand up for what they believe?

I was worried that she would be picked on, for some random reason, and that she would not be able to stand up for herself.  You hear how mean kids are to each other, and  how much bullying goes around in schools.  Girls may not use fists but words can hurt as much, if not worse sometimes. 

So.... M started school and she loves it!  She has friends and she is learning so much. I am so happy and proud of her. 

..... I can't help it but wonder how it will be once she gets older.  Will she know how to respond to hateful words?  Will she help others in need?  Will we have to deal with bullying?  Will we have to worry about bullying?

Why am I so worried about these issues?  I am not sure....... perhaps because I am a mother who wants my kids to be happy and good.  But when I look around me I see so much hatred, so much intolerance, so much prejudice, so little compassion, so little understanding, too much emphasis on what does not matter and too little emphasis on what is important in life........  that is why I do wonder how it is going to be when the girls grow up.  What will the world be like? 


 

Illowa 2012

ILLOWA

39th Annual Undergraduate Psychology Conference

Hosted by The Department of Psychology

(AND)

Saturday April 28, 2012

This past weekend, my colleagues and I went to Eureka College in Illinois, to watch  undergraduate students present their research at a conference called Illowa, while also taking our undergraduate psychology students.


Wow! That's what I have to say. What a great experience to be able to watch these students present some very interesting studies!  The topics ranged from: GPA and college life involvement, reading comprehension and ebooks, drinking and academic behavior, to obesity and discrimination and many other ones.  It was such a pleasure to watch these students present their findings, or lack thereof, and watching them talk about their ideas and how they tested those ideas was priceless.


More activities like that should be part of undergraduate education. Students should be able to experience this form of education more often.   Learning is more than just books and a teacher in a classroom.  Learning is also the development of critical thinking, that we as educators, can help students develop with activities such as Illowa.

Knowledge is Power!!!!

Once I asked students:  "why are you here?"

"to get a degree to get a better job" replied one student.
"to transfer to a 4y college" said another student.
"so that I don't have to move out of my parents house," another student.
"I don't know!" said another student.

I have asked that same question many times, to many different students, and I have never heard " I am here because I want to learn!"

What happened to wanting to know things?  What happened to curiosity?  Remember when we were kids and everything was "why?"  But why?  why?  Parents got tired of answering the "why" questions, or simply ran out of "because" answers.  However, once we got older we no longer ask "why."  We no longer wonder why things are the way they are.

We forgot somehow that the more information we gain the more power we will have.   Now, I am not talking about physical power, I am talking about the power of making wise, rational choices.  The power of learning from past mistakes, yours or others.  The power to make your own decisions and the power to live through the consequences.  But most importantly the power to know who you are and what you can do with all this power.

Where did our curiosity go?

Putting 7-year-old on a diet: Responsible, or reprehensible?

Putting 7-year-old on a diet: Responsible, or reprehensible?


I am sure that the mother means well, specially because the pediatrician said that the child is obese, however... withholding food is not the correct way to go about this. 
There are healthier and better ways to insure that your child is healthy!!!  Exercise anyone!!!  Fruits!!! 

We have a very big issue in our culture:  Obesity! 
We have become obsessed with the way we look, "do those pants make my butt look big?"
The pressure to be skinny is very high, and sometimes people will take drastic measures to get there.  Therefore it is not surprising that eating disorders are so prevalent in our society,.... specially if you are a female.

Even when we try to promote healthy behavior, such as joining a gym to get regular physical activity, we still manage to send the wrong message.
"join the gym to lose weight!"   "join now to get a beach body!"   "to lose pregnancy weight!"   "to wear size 6!"  "to feel sexy!"

Instead we should be saying:
"join the gym to live longer!"  "to breathe better!"   "to not have a heart attack!"   "to have lower cholesterol!"   "to help with your blood pressure!"    "to be able to go up the stairs!"     "join the gym to be HEALTHIER!!!!"

What Matters!!!

The other day in my human sexuality class, we ended the class with the statement "spread love, not hatred!"

I know that I can be "cheesy" sometimes, but I really mean what I say to my students.  :)

As a society we need to learn to be accepting of others!  We have learned through our culture and our social norms that, if you don't fit in the paradigm that society has "invented," than you are wrong, or a sinner, or abnormal, or weird.  With this as part of our background we almost instinctively try to conform to the norms of society, whatever they may be. 

But what happens to those that do not, or cannot conform?  Those that society sees as outcasts? 
Well.... that is when discrimination, prejudice and hatred may come into place.  
We have become entitled to judge others and to believe that everyone must agree with us on everything. However, by thinking this way, we may have lost the perspective that the beauty of the world is in its diversity.  We don’t all have to share the same beliefs, and my conception of what morals and values are, may be very different from someone else or from a different society……. And guess what!!!  That is OK!  It is OK to be different; it is OK to be yourself!

It should not matter if you are white, black, green, yellow, or if you are gay, straight, bi, or Catholic, Muslim, Baptist, all that should matter is, that fundamental characteristic, that one that society seems to forget the most.  Are you a GOOD human being???  This is what should matter!!!!

Somehow we have forgotten what is really important.....

I love teaching!!!

I love my job, I really do!  I enjoy coming to work and teaching to my students everyday.  You never know what might happen in my classes, and the "that's what she said," never gets old, at least to me it doesn't!

This is how I see teaching:  
1. You can learn and have fun at the same time. 
2. You can get to know your students.  (Students are people too!)
3. You can learn from them.
4. You can join them or fight them.  (It is OK to text in my classes)
5. You can inspire them.
6. You can teach them more than what the book says.
7. You can open their mind to new things.
8. You can see them change
9. You can see them grow.
10. You can influence who they are going to be

I care about my students, I care if they are learning, I care if they are OK and I care to make a difference.  One by one, some may learn just psychology but hopefully many will learn much more. I teach more than just psychology!

Sexual Orientation is not so simple!

"the heterosexuality or homosexuality of many individuals is not an all-or-none proposition." Alfred Kinsey

Back from Spring Break

Back from Spring Break, however I really didn't have much of a break.  But here I am today, looking at the faces of my students, and excited to see them again.  Some are happy to be back, but some could use a little bit more time.......  who couldn't use more time?