Just another typical day at work, you know the typical
ritual of answering emails, talking to students and teaching, or so I
thought. Ten minutes into my last class of the day, a
female student who was seated at her desk turned towards the floor to get the books
she had dropped, however she never came back up. She had passed out in class, right there
right then. So what? That has happened before to many of us,
students pass out for many different reason in many different classes. But this one student in my class today did
not surprise me at all when she passed out.
See, this female student has been dealing with eating disorders for
about 7 years and what is even worse is the fact that she is only 17yo.
I had noticed her facial expressions when we talked about
certain topics in class, and even when she walked out of class when we were watching
a video about anorexia. I knew that she
was struggling with the “horrible” thought of being fat; however I had no idea of
how much suffering she was going through.
Why does this bother me so much???? Why does it devastate me so much????
Four days ago, as I was driving my 6yo daughter back home after
her indoor soccer practice, she said she was hungry. I opened my purse and I handed her a small
bag of chips because that was the only thing that I had at the time. She got excited and after a few minutes of
eating the chips she handed me the bag and said:
“Here mommy, I am done, I don’t want to eat all of it because
I don’t want to be fat”
What???? My baby, my
daughter, my 6yo daughter is hungry and doesn’t want to eat because she is afraid
of being fat!!! All of a sudden I felt
angry and replied, “Mel you don’t need to worry about that!” Yes I was angry! I was very angry that my
baby was already afraid of being fat, that she was already concerned about not
eating too much, that she was already worried about what she looks like, but
most of all, I was pissed for the fact that she is only 6 and this worry should
not be anywhere close to her head right now!
Soon that anger turned into sadness and fear.
Then very calmly I said, “Mel honey, you just played soccer
and you are hungry, it is ok to eat!”
What she said next was even more shocking to me: “but mom when I move my
legs it jiggles,” while pointing to her inner thighs, “do your legs jiggle too
when you move?” “Oh yea Mel, my legs
jiggle too, everyone’s leg jiggles.” “But
Mel, why are you thinking about that?” I asked. “I don’t know mommy, I just see people and I
don’t want to be fat.”
I didn’t know what else to say, do I make it a big deal and
keep asking questions? Do I talk about
it as a matter of fact? What do I
do???? “Mel you need to eat to grow, to
have strong muscles, to be able to learn at school, to be able to play sports
and not be tired, you need to eat to be healthy.” And that was the end of the conversation.
So, today I come to work and have my 17yo student pass out
in class because of her eating disorder and now I am more than afraid, I am terrified
by the idea that my child may be its next victim.
I am writing this post asking for support, advice, ideas,
anything to help me figure out what to do now to prevent her from being that
17yo girl. Can I do something? Anything?
Can WE do something about it????
